Language arts

I have a friend who was worried about her child's language. I confessed that I'd have to admit the shortcomings in our home if I were honest. Like the time that I told our daughter she shouldn't say "*itch" because it makes God sad.

Her response: "Does it make God sad when you say '*itch?'"
Yeah well. They learn really quick. But I think I've learned even more. Gotta love them.
Truly.

Learning to Talk

I guess it's all about communication in our home lately.
Cookie Monster is starting to voice his opinions more. Guess he realizes he needs to add to the chaos and noise. So, the pacifier ("bass" as he calls it) is starting to come out and words are flowing.
When asked who had the gas problem in the van on the way home, the two oldest shook their heads no.
Cookie Monster's reply: "Me."

After the dog barfed AGAIN, Cookie Monster went from room to room saying, "Lily barf, Lily barf."

Guess that's better than some of Farmer Boy's first sentences. I think they sounded something like "daddy moron." Oops, wonder where he got that from???
Dad, right.

Pillow Talk

"Mom, come see (the Princess)," I heard from the living room. So I stopped what I was doing and went in to see what was going on.
Dad, casually resting on the couch, was right next to the Princess.
By the time I arrived, she was beginning to get agitated.
Why, you ask?

Because Farmer Boy had zipped her into a pillowcase. Yes, a pillowcase. You know, the ones that cover body pillows.
You laugh. I laugh now.
A normal reaction.
However, slight problem considering the Princess has a history of having seizures. Normally these occur following an incident with said Farmer Boy.
While she begins flailing around. (As much as one can do in an 18-inch wide pillowcase, dad lays RIGHT next to her on the couch as if nothing is happening.)
Meanwhile, I'm trying to find the end of the zipper. It took what seemed like forever.
Farmer Boy was scolded. Dad was scolded.
All was well.
The end
Just another "Crazy in the Country" dad, er, Day!

Toilet talk

Toilet talk. So when does this stage end anyway?? Or the actions to go with it. Farmer boy has to take a "R" item for show-and-tell this week. One option: the runs. Yep. Finally, he decided on something else that causes the runs: Runza sandwiches.

Then this morning at Bible Study. Yes, Bible Study, the Princess kept farting. For everyone in the room to hear. She was quite proud of herself too.

And #3 (wait, I got scolded for referring to him as that), I mean, Cookie Monster now makes a refreshing "ahhhhh" sound after he farts.

Isn't parenting fun??

At least the babe is a girl, right. Oh wait, "the Princess" was the guilty party at Bible Study. Oh, many more years of this!!

Remember when..??

I know we all have a photo like one of these, somewhere. One of our favorites mimicks the "orange" picture below. Beware, you might wet yourself from laughing so hard. I received these in an email titled "Olan Mills' Awesomeness." Enjoy!

Here were the captions:

1. Olan Mills backdrop #4: Bucolic Meadow with Split Rail Fence. Is that an animal carcass behind her?
2. Drake won Bitchin'est Senior Mullet by a landslide.
3. I've got a 20 that says he drives a Camaro.
4. Patrick broke ranks and chose drag over the bow tie.
5. The library might be more believable if the shelves weren't sloping downhill.
6. This photo isn't discolored. The 70s really were that orange.
7. Bobbi isn't the first waitress to fall for her manager, but they both got fired from Shoney's.

Bloodshed

Nice, when I went to take a long, hot bath in this cold, cold weather a few days ago, I told kids not to bother me unless someone was bleeding. Their response: "We'll make someone bleed." Nice. Who's kids are these anyway???

Grrrr.......the attack dog!

The 15-pound protector of our home! I feel sorry for LaRue when she gets older. Let's hope by the time she can talk (back), I don't mistake her name for the dog since they both have "bell" in them.